At that time, my mother, then became a widow who was solely responsible for providing for my sister and myself. I was 15 and my sister was 11.
I won’t go into the details but I can tell you my mother did not have it easy. She struggled and busted her ass to make sure that my sister and I never had to do without.
I have learned so much about life (and love) from my mother. In fact, it was her dedication and commitment to my dad during his illness that helped me to realize what Love really is.
To this day I still don’t know how she did it. She would run back and forth to the hospital, work two jobs, cook, clean, do laundry and take on all the responsibilities of both a mother and a father.
On the surface, everything felt as normal as it could be. But that was only because my mother was so good at not letting us see how hard she was struggling..
About a year after my dad passed, after getting fully acclimated into her new life as a widow, my mother decided to put herself out there into the world. She did not go out into the world in pursuit of a man to take my dad’s place, but she went out to learn how to enjoy her life again.
You see, for years my mom was so focused on taking care of my dad and us kids that she didn’t have time for herself.
Bu after being thrust into a new and different life she realized that she had two choices. She could sit around and feel sorry for herself or she could pick herself up and put herself out into the world.
When my dad had passed my mom did not have one friend who was single. Everyone in her social circles was married. So she decided to meet some new friends.
In her few spare minutes of free time she found a couple of social groups. And within a few months she had a nucleus of new friends and acquaintances to help keep her mind off of her struggles.
And a little while later, four years after my dad’s death, she met my step dad, Joe.
It wasn’t “love at first site” and there were no fireworks or instant chemistry. In fact, when they first met she wasn’t even sure if she liked Joe. But the more she got to know hm, the more she got to see what kind of “MAN” he was, the more she fell in love with him.
And in 1988, they got married.
Now Joe will never be my “DAD” but he will always be a father figure to me. He is one of the nicest, kindest men I have ever met in my life. And he has always treated my sister and me as if we were his own children.
So, why am I sharing this with you?
Because I here all these myths and misconceptions about men (all the good ones are taken/they only care about sex/they can’t commit, etc).
I also hear from women who believe that “they’re too old”, “maybe it’s not supposed to happen for them” or they have have lost their soul mate and they’ll never find a love like that again.
I understand the concept of having a “soul mate” and to be honest I believe in one way or another we are all soul mates for each other. There to love, support and assist each other in this thing called life.
But the fact that my mom has had two great guys to love her and commit to her means that there really are no boundaries and limits to love (other than those you have in your own mind).
So, if you have not met a great man to share your life with or you had but he’s no longer around, please remember this story.
Remember that it can happen again.
The key is for you to put yourself out there so that when the right guy comes along he realizes how awesome you are and he decides that he doesn’t want to let you go.